Wednesday, January 11, 2006
As the World Turns .... Over
It is hard to believe that just 24 hours ago I was having a wonderful afternoon with my boys ... enjoying the unseasonably warm day and practicing my photographic skills (or lack of). It made my heart full to watch them chase around in circles until their cheeks glowed a vibrant pink and search the grass and dirt carefully for precious little snails. I felt free and full and giddy with life. Fast forward to now ... turmoil. That is all I feel. The turmoil is spinning in my head and chest like a small but destructive tornado. I feel drowsy but sickenly alert ... my limbs feel so heavy but yet I feel lightheaded. If I didn't know better I would just write it off to the hormonal roller coaster. However -- unless I somehow unknowingly was given a recent free admission on that perilous ride, hormones wouldn't be the answer. I've never succombed to the hormonal trips except during my two pregnancies. Ahhhhhhhh ... maybe it's time to go pee on a little stick!?! At this point I would most definitely want to see the word PREGNANT on the cleverly designed digital doo-dad -- just so I would have a very good reason to feel the way I do today. 3 minutes and I shall know ... right?
***Okay, it's been slightly more than 3 minutes but I had to get the boys down for their naps. And it seems I wasted a ridiculously over-priced digital doo-dad. I did get to see PREGNANT on the little screen but it was preceeded by NOT. Perhaps I should go down for a nap also while all is quiet. Maybe the fury will be quashed by the silence. I can only pray.
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